Wednesday, 31 December 2014

Last Blog Post Of 2014

Hooray! Here's to another awesome year ending! Goodbye 2014, and let's welcome 2015 with opened arms and a positive outlook. Woot! Woot! But wait! Before I make a grand entrance into 2015, lemme' put up this blog post first hehe. Rather than posting my yearly New Year Resolutions, I've written some kind of short reflection of my 2014. Without further ado, here it is~

1. What younger me would like about present me

They say that experience changes a person. 2014 has definitely changed me(like every other year). It was filled with so many happenings, good and bad. There were times when all I wanted to do was be cooped up in my bedroom, isolated from the outside world. However, there were those days that kept me going. Those were the days I'd be forever grateful for.

Gratefulness
That's what I really like about the present me. "Count your blessings, not your neighbors'." I used to be this kind of person who was never satisfied with what I had. I always wanted more. I wanted to be better than everybody. I could have, would have, should have. My world revolved mostly around those three phrases. It was tiring to be like that all the time. Never satisfied. It was like a hunger that couldn't be quenched. As long as I could still go on, what I have now is never enough. That was my mentality. Surprisingly, I didn't realize that until I said something to a friend of mine. It made me sound like an ungrateful biatch. Sigh.

2. The watched/read it list

I can't really list everything down here. You can check out some of the books I've read by clicking 'Angelica's Quotes' that will direct you to my Goodreads profile instead hehe. As for movies, I don't really keep track. Teehee!

3. The mistake(s) I never want to make

1. I never ever want to betray anybody's trust.
2. Never ever fall for the wrong guy again(Haha! I don't think this is plausible because like you, I'm human too. This list does not guarantee that I'll be living a Saint's life).
3. Never ever waste my time on people/things/situations that doesn't make me happy.
4. Never ever want to eat shrimp, it gives me mild allergy. Ugh.
5. Regret. Every action I take is done for a reason. It may sound irrational a few years down the road, but at least I wouldn't be left thinking that I should have done it a few years back. I wouldn't be left with regret because I was too scared to give it a try.

4. My ideal outfit

I've been told that my fashion sense is good haha. Okay, then I guess I don't have to make much changes. I'll stick with my casual and fashionable way :)

5. A deep, dark secret

Wanna know my secret? Highlight the space below ;)
AHA! Gotcha! Just ask me personally if you wanna know haha!




6. The most unexpected compliment(s) you ever got

I actually couldn't wait to write this one down. So much for being humble, Angel. Haha! There was this one time when I was trying on clothes in front of my sis. Out of the blue, she complimented my collar bone. That was so unexpected of her because she usually doesn't give me compliments and that is a weird thing to say.

7. That one quote

*Quickly flips through pages of quotes* This one quote has been giving me courage ever since 5ever, especially at my lowest.
Everything happens for a reason.

8. The best surprise I've ever had

Surprise me :)

9. Your true happiness

Lies within myself. Really! One's happiness shouldn't be dependent on a person or materialistic pleasures. They can easily come and go. What'd be left of you once they're gone?

10. My favorite failure(s)

My favorite failure? The dumbest mistake I've done on the last year of my secondary school life, which was not so long ago.
It's a pretty long and embarrassing story BUT without that dumb mistake happening, I don't think I'll be where I am today :)

11. An amendment to the bucket list

Gonna reconstruct my list. every single one of them that hasn't been done or seem impossible(come on, be an astronaut for a day?). If you're a daily reader of my blog, you'd have seen it here. It's ridiculous, I swear haha




Thursday, 27 November 2014

Either you swim forward or sink

If by some turn of events I end up in Infocomm Solutions(Lotsa programming) in Year 3, God, please have mercy on me. It's not that I don't like it — there are times that I do get frustrated with it and I just want to burn my laptop to dust. Haha kidding my baby is too precious — it's just that I'm not that confident with coding. Huhu. MyOhMy

Saturday, 22 November 2014

I don't even know

You know what? Just get on with life. Do what you love. Make others happy, and in the process will make you happy too. Live life to the foolest(Be the best fool out there). All of us are fools waiting for something awesome to happen but get disappointed when it doesn't.

Friday, 21 November 2014

Here And There

How a small change can entail a huge difference, aye? Okay, it's not that huge to boast about but I'm pretty proud of the change(s) I've made so far, no matter the size. It made me see things in a different light. I've managed to get out of my cocoon, fly out into the world I was once oh-so weary of. Haha. That was kind of random but hey, who cares. Good bye for now, I know this is pretty short but I don't really know what else to say other than sharing that mini achievement of mine hehe.

Sunday, 26 October 2014

Bottle

Never in a thousand years am I going to post that. The emotions are just too raw, too exposed to be known.

Thursday, 9 October 2014

I just hope it doesn't come back. I shouldn't have neglected that fact and pushed it aside as if it's nothing.

Sunday, 28 September 2014

Caught the bug

Sigh... So recently, my laptop caught the bug and I'm currently and hopefully temporarily using my phone to blog. Such a sad, sad thing for me. What's worst is that school is gonna start soon. As an IT student, my laptop is practically an extension of ma body. We use and breathe computer. Haha. I can't afford my laptop to completely die on me(the only prob it's facing now is that it can't access the network even though it is connected to the internet, and our wifi is working fine.). My anti-virus software has failed its job. Its one and only job. Gawddamnit!! Grrrrrrrrr!!

Wednesday, 24 September 2014

Night

What I hate the most are the thoughts that enter your mind at night. Those are the thoughts that often remind and make you realize something, be it a happy or a sad one. It can be anything.

Monday, 22 September 2014

Tossing and turning

I don't think I'll be able to sleep properly tonight. Worst case scenario, not at all.

Wednesday, 17 September 2014

Somebody once told me...

My mentor from work once asked me this simple question, "If you were a billionaire parent, would you give your five year old kid $1000?" My first answer to this was, "Yes. If I had billions of dollars, giving away $1000 to my kid shouldn't be a problem. My kid deserves it anyway." Like come on, you would too, right? There's absolutely nothing wrong with that except, what would a five year old do with that kind of money? Hmm that got me thinking.

An innocent kid who hasn't been exposed to the kind of world where you  have to rip what you sow and sadly it's not like that all the time. A lad who's completely oblivious to what's happening around him. The boy can't possibly spend every penny of that money on toys. That'd be crazy. It'd be a complete waste to spend it on frivolous things.

My mentor made me realise that there's a reason why you don't have the things you want right now. It's because you can't handle such responsibility at this stage of your life yet or maybe it's not really for you. Before you get what you want, you have to prove to God first that you are worthy to be given of what you demand. You can't just lie around and be a potato and expect a sack of gold to appear at your door by the end of the day.

Life doesn't work that way. You have to go out there and experience life. Now, this is where life becomes tough. In life, you don't always succeed. You are deemed to fail at one point but that doesn't mean you'll never succeed. You have to give yourself a chance to see, feel and learn the things around you. Once you've experienced all that, you'll find a purpose. That purpose will then be the reason why you should be given that kind of responsibility.

Sunday, 14 September 2014

Project Spontaneous

Here's to another crazy decision! This path is definitely gonna put me out of my little bubble but as long as it'll contribute to my personal growth, why not right? This is gonna be one hell of another roller coster ride. Hold yourself together, Angel!



Me gonna take the plunge haha

Tuesday, 2 September 2014

One ending

The Dream Guy


In every girl's life, there is always that one guy that you had once pined for because he was the epitome of perfection. He was that guy you had been looking for. He had hit every single thing in your list. He is the type of guy all those Disney Princesses always end up with, except you. Sadly. He was that guy that made you batshit crazy and hit your friends whenever you felt tickled-pink. It made you wonder. Were you in love with him? No, you were not. You were just blinded by his awesomeness :)

This is going to sound cheesy and cliche but he was that guy whose name filled your notebook's pages, surrounded with cute little pink hearts. He had turned you into this sappy Shakespeare wannabe.That was not all though. Soon, you started wanting him to notice you. You wanted to be beautiful, inside and out. You wanted to be smart and funny. You wanted to be perfect for him. He inspired you to be a better person. You participated in all kinds of competitions and activities, knowing that you would not win anyway but you still tried and put in your all in hopes that he would notice you for your diligence and hard work. 

At the end of the day, you became this better version of yourself because of him. Was it really because of him? Hmmm I do not think so. He was merely a catalyst. You were the one who made it happen. It was your choice to take action even though your motivation was quite.. you know. The good thing about this is that you did not lose yourself in the midst of that crazy ass crush phase you had gotten yourself into. Despite that you two did not end up together, you got something in return. It might not be his heart but it is far greater than that.

The First Boyfriend

Your first glimpse of the relationship world. It was not what you expected. It was not like how movies or books portrayed it to be. It was scary and frustrating.You did not know how to navigate your way through but thankfully he was there to guide you. He might not have been the love of your life but he was somebody special. He was always there even though you pushed him away countless of time. 

He was always there. He deserved someone better. Excuses after excuses. It made you break his heart eventually. You did not have a choice,or did you? But what was done cannot be undone. It was for his own good anyway even though he was hurting.
The looks you got from his friends. The look that says it all. You broke him. How could you? 

You felt miserable. You thought you deserved those resentful looks from his friends. You felt like you did not have the right to love and be loved anymore. The guilt was killing you. Slowly gnawing every bit of your conscience. You imprisoned your heart. Not allowing anybody to get close to you in fear that history might repeat itself.

The First Love

Ahhh... You thought you were holding up your walls pretty well until that one boy managed tear them apart. He was the one who swept you off your feet. You really thought he was the one. He was not perfect like Dream Guy or as patient as First Boyfriend but you loved him nonetheless. He was the reason why you sneaked out of the house at such an ungodly timing. The reason why you lied to your parents and used your friends as an excuse to see him. You told yourself you would never do that again but still did.

He was the one who thought you were beautiful and cute even though you made a fool of yourself, every single damn time. He was the guy that made you experience the feeling of love and how it was like to be loved. He understood you. However, love does not always reside in Sunnyville. It is more than that. You learnt to be more patient, understanding, open-minded, unselfish. You learnt to love him for who he is, his flaws. You embraced it. 

Eventually, all that blinded you. You did not realize that it was doing no good to you anymore. You started disobeying your parents, ignoring your friends' warnings. You thought they were jealous because you had something so beautiful. You lost yourself in this love. Like most first loves, it did not end well.


Love takes you on a roller coaster ride. It is fun, exhilarating and a wee bit scary(yeah right haha). It will make you feel regretful once you reach the plunge. All you can do at this point is pray that you will survive this and put your trust and life on your seatbelt. But at the end of this ride, you feel grateful that you tried.

Sunday, 31 August 2014

Love and baking

The yummy mistake that we ended up creating

Love is like baking
It takes patience to muster up something pleasing and not create a poison that could potentially kill you
You need to be certain of the measurements
 You cannot just pour out everything, you would be wasting ingredients
Either way, being not so generous with the amount can also affect the outcome
Everything has to be precise -not too much, not too less- before you pop that tray of goodness into the oven
It is all about being meticulous 
You cannot afford to make any room for mistakes because once it is done, it is done
You would not want all your effort be put in vain, right?
However, despite of all your mishaps in the kitchen, mistakes can surprisingly create something unexpected and wonderful
Like Professor X and the Power Puff Girls
Mistake does not always equate to something horrible
Without mistakes, you will not learn
You will not discover new things
Everything would be perfect
Where is the fun in that?



Thursday, 21 August 2014

In my head: Just a random rant about life and life

I keep getting distracted from my revision and exam is just a week away. Geez, Angel.
But anyways, that's not the reason why I am loitering around my blog instead of studying. I am here because I have been thinking -excuse me, I have always been thinking just fyi- about something that concerns not only me but others out there who are like me. I had been pushing it aside every time it tried to emerge to the surface. Letting it sit idly at the back of my mind like a clothing waiting to be worn but days, weeks and years have passed.

People who are still sitting on the fence. Unsure of what they want in the future to come. Who will I be? What will I be? Where will I be? Those are some of the common questions we always ask ourselves but we never seem to figure out the answers just yet.
Remember when you were a little boy/girl and you wanted to be a fireman, a doctor, a scientist and all other crazy things even? Remember when your parents said you can be anything you want? At that point in time, you wanted to be a lot of things, not thinking about how or where it is going to bring you to. You just want to be that person because that is what you want to be. In other words, things like money, position and opinions of others do not matter as long as you become that person you aspire to be.
Now, back to the present. Choosing a career has become a life changing decision in which you have to think thoroughly. It is not like when you were a little kid anymore. Suddenly everything matters. You are in a crossroad and you do not know which way to go. You are not lost. Just undecided. Give yourself some time to figure things out. It is not too late yet but do not forget, time waits for no one.
As of now, enjoy the moment. Experience the ups and downs of life. Love it and hate it. 
Till we meet again, see you at your destination(that is if we end up in the same place but I doubt that would even happen haha) :)


7 More Days To Freedom!



This is the depiction of my gaganess. Told you it's scary haha

That sudden outburst of enthusiasm and spontaneity from me is quite shocking I must say. I thought that side of me was long gone but surprise surprise, it popped out of nowhere and what an impeccable timing it has haha. I think my craziness has lain dormant for quite some time. My inner gaganess is pounding at the door, eager for it to be let out in the wild. Hold still my dear, just a little bit more time. You'll be out and about soon. 

Tuesday, 12 August 2014

Last day! Woot! Woot!



Programming and I have a love/hate relationship



Tomorrow officially marks the last day for submission of projects. Oh yes, I could hear my freedom calling me from afar. Yup, from afar. There's still the exam. Sucks but hey at least I only have two papers to sit for and they're both two weeks away from now. Can't wait for this semester to come to an end but I'm so not ready to see my GPA.

Friday, 8 August 2014

Daaaaaaaaaaamn

Just a little bit more, Angel. Just a few more weeks and it's the school holiday. Hang in there you lil biatch.

Thursday, 31 July 2014

Still alive but I'm barely breathing in this ocean of projects, assignments, tests, exams...

Year 2 Semester 1 is such a hellish sem. I just can't, man. I'm beyond exhausted; mentally. I honestly thought that by having Common Tests gone from our course, we'd have it better. Guess I'm wrong and the last laugh goes to those dreadful projects. Week after week we had projects due. I can't believe I+group mates managed to hand in those projects in time. Quality-wise, I hope it's there :/
*sob sob* Goodbye good GPA.

That's me on my study table minus the freaky smile

Tuesday, 24 June 2014

Trying to make sense of this out of the blue thought

Those feelings were long gone but life never fails to surprise me over and over again
I really don't know
I thought I'd feel nothing
The suppressed feelings emerged from the depth of this numb- now no longer- heart of mine
The numbness disappeared and is replaced with the feelings that once upon a time made me the happiest girl on earth...

[To be continued...]


Words just suddenly poured out of me and they deserve to be written or else these words will turn to nothing, and I don't like that. I will do them justice! Haha. Maybe this will be a story, a poem, a song... Who knows :)

Monday, 23 June 2014

Talking to myself again

Mind and Heart, please stop dwelling on the past. It's such a waste of time, so please stop and do what's good for you.

Friday, 13 June 2014

Semester break is here! Woo to the hoo!

FINALLY! Done with those hectic weeks. Now, it's time to relax(A bit. There are still projects due after the two weeks sem break. Can you believe that? Haha booo!!) Anyways, I'll be going on a vacation with the fam back home tomorrow. Can't wait :")

Monday, 2 June 2014

Can't wait!

11 more days to Semester break and 11 days to my flight back home. Can't wait for it >.<
I just need to get through these dreadful remaining days before my freedom.

Saturday, 17 May 2014

Gotta start being healthy again. Cut down on junk foods and start exercising XD

Switching

On and off, on and off, on and off, on and off until the light bulb burns out

Tuesday, 13 May 2014

Should I?

It's like a dream
The nightmares and the sweet dreams
You keep wanting to go back to sleep because of those sweet dreams
But those endless nightmares won't stop creeping up on you
They keep you awake at night
Scared and alone
It makes you think
Should I go back  to sleep?
Should I? Should I?

No school today. Whoopeee!

Today's the day that I have no mood for anything. Like nothing at all. All I wanna do is sleep and roll in bed the whole day without a care in the world.

Cause I'm hot then I'm cold

One moment I'm up, the next thing I'm down. Meh Angel you lil crazy person

Friday, 9 May 2014

Wednesday, 7 May 2014

Oh well, carry on and keep moving

I have finally received the result of my appeal and sadly, it has been rejected. Boohoo oh well, at least I tried, right? It kind of put my mood down but thank God despite of that news, today wasn't that bad :)

Monday, 5 May 2014

Caught the flu?

I didn't really catch a flu, at least not the kind you're thinking of right now. It's those pesky little feelings that make you feel all giddy and girly whenever you see that certain someone. That dream isn't helping either. Ever had that kind of dream that made you like somebody whom you didn't have feelings for initially but because of that one dream, he's all you think of and probably crushing on now? Okay, I did have an inkling feeling of like for him but it was gone in an instant. Pfft just like that, it disappeared. Gah I don't know what to do with these feels.They aren't foreign to me unlike last time. I know how navigate my way through but the problem this time round is I don't know which road to take.

Friday, 2 May 2014

Wednesday, 30 April 2014

Things are going well, surprisingly. I guess I just have to think more positively and instead of purely concentrating on my goals, I should focus on the process.

Sunday, 27 April 2014

Those days will never disappear. It makes me think of those lonely rainy afternoons. You could hear the raindrops pelted against the window. You’re all alone as you stare at the world outside. You want to feel the rain on your skin, feel the wind caress your face while you close eyes. You see people rushing in all directions, wanting to find shelter. And then you realised you would rather stay in than be like them. 

Saturday, 26 April 2014

Goodbye

I should really let go and get out of this situation that doesn't make me happy anymore. Maybe that's not really for me. Now, I did give myself enough time to adjust to the changes but the feeling that has been knocking over and over again, refusing to stop like some annoying door-to-door sellers, is still here. I can't ignore that anymore. It's not leading to something good, I guess it has finally served its purpose

Friday, 25 April 2014

Society is us

There's really no such thing as right and wrong, good and bad. It's all in what we believe in. The society has made us think that way

Monday, 21 April 2014

Hmmm

Should I join another CCA? But I don't have anyone I know of who's willing to join with the club I want :( Boohoo this sucks

Back to school

Oh Monday blues. Oh first day back in school. No longer a Freshie haha. I could say today went fine, not good or bad. Just fine. An average day for moi. I had morning classes- boohoo to that- but the upside is that we were released at 12 noon. Weeeeee! So much for Monday blues huh? Well, my Mondays aren't so blue anymore :3 P.S Freshies, Freshies everywhere o____o

Tuesday, 15 April 2014

Why not?

I don't care. I'm gonna give this a shot and if it doesn't work out, at least I tried it. I won't be living my life with regret. Hahahehehihihohohuhu

Monday, 14 April 2014

So many 'what ifs'

Sometimes, I wonder if I made the right decisions. What if I chose History over Geography, and what if I took Amath in secondary school like what my Math teacher suggested? What if I didn't change my mind and went for Industrial Design instead of Multimedia and Infocomm Tech in poly? I'm starting to doubt my choices and I feel more pressured with the decisions I'm going to make :/

Tuesday, 8 April 2014

Friday, 4 April 2014

I'm an introvert but...

Are you an introvert just like me? Don't you get tired of people assuming you're like this or that, and in the end, people get the wrong impression of you— most of them make you sound like a caveman who's scared of the sunlight— I get annoyed at all these wronlgy assumed facts about introverts but I've learnt to deal with them in my own way(:
So,to get some things straight, here's a list of some facts about introverts that are true and notso true.

#1
Introverts are quiet because they are sad/lonely/snobby

Fact or Myth: Totally a myth

Being quiet doesn't always equate to being sad, lonely or even snobby. We introverts are quiet around people because sometimes, we just don't have anything to say or don't know what to say to them. That's all. There's no mojo jojo happening either. Also, introverts are not really into small talks. We prefer long conversations that fall inside the bubble of our interests.

As for me, there's another reason to why I'm quiet most of the time. You
d probably seen me staring at nothing from time to time. Fret not, I wasn't seeing something you couldn't see, I was just having my usual internal dialogues with myself and I. Therefore, please don't get offended if I talk to you seldomly or not at all. It's not you, it's just me(;

You'd be surprised and probably quite annoyed once we start to talk your ears off.


#2
Introverts are shy/anti-social/socially awkward creatures

Fact or Myth: Myth and as for being socially awkward, it's slightly true, well in my case

Now, introverts are not shy or anti-social by default. We definitely are not, we like having fun and going all crazy too like Katy Perry's persona in her Last Friday Night MV. The reason why we don't appear to b where the crowd most of the time is because it drains us. Yes, interacting with a lot of people most f the time exhaust the hell out of us. If we don't get our daily dosage of 'me time', we get all moody. So, don't get disheartened if we usually decline your invitations to hang out. Just keep 'em coming and we'll accept it when we're fully charged again(:

As for the socially awkward part, I guess it all depends on the amount of time you spend with people determines your capability to handle situations that involve them. If you want to be more confident around people and not make a fool of yourself, go out there and mingle. Reading those guide books alone will get you nowhere— you're only half way there— you've got to do the real thing because acting it out is totally different from just making up scenarios in your head.


#3
Introverts don't make good leaders or public speakers

Fact or Myth: Myth and myth

Who said we don't make good leaders? Hell yeah we definitely can if we want to! Bill Gates, Abraham Lincoln and Ghandi are just some examples of leaders who are actually introverts. Surprising? Not for me. Before you guys bash me or something, I'm not saying extroverts are bad at being leaders, both types make good leaders as a matter of fact. Like what Daniel Pink said, "...in some sense we are all born to sell and equipped to lead. And that means a hidden but urgent challenge for organizations of every kind is to shatter the stereotypes of who's an effective leader." So there you have it, introverts and extroverts are equipped to be great leaders.

When it comes to public speaking, we can dance our way up the stage and do our stuff too, you know. We are those type of people who have a lot going on in our heads but just keep them in there. It takes courage and practice to be able to stand in front of a huge crowd and send the message across without peeing in our pants.


#4
You can easily distinguish us from the extroverts

Fact or Myth: What? It's not a costume one can wear, okay? Therefore, it's definitely a myth


Whoever thought of this is so judgemental. Ugh. Okay, not everyone of us are purely introverted or extroverted. If you lay yourself out n a spectrum, you'll most likely fall in between the two ends or more to this side or that. The environment a person is brought up in or a situation he/she finds oneself in can affect his/her trait. For example, an extrovert who grew up in a family that encourages reading a lot may come off as an introvert to some. Being a bookworm doesn't make you an introvert. A situation we found ourselves in also place a part. Our society can be quite biased towards extroverted personality traits. Therefore, you've got to be flexible if you want survive out there. 

Monday, 31 March 2014

Silver lining or naawt?

It's like this almost every year that I'm starting to get used to this. Sigh
At least that's the silver lining of my cloud, right? 
Hunting again for quotes that'll be added to my lil purple canvas notebook. Here's one of them(:
This life is what you make it. No matter what, you're going to mess up sometimes, it's a universal truth. But the good part is you get to decide how you're going to mess it up. Girls will be your friends - they'll act like it anyway. But just remember, some come, some go. The ones that stay with you through everything - they're your true best friends. Don't let go of them. Also remember, sisters make the best friends in the world. As for lovers, well, they'll come and go too. And baby, I hate to say it, most of them - actually pretty much all of them are going to break your heart, but you can't give up because if you give up, you'll never find your soulmate. You'll never find that half who makes you whole and that goes for everything. Just because you fail once, doesn't mean you're gonna fail at everything. Keep trying, hold on, and always, always, always believe in yourself, because if you don't, then who will, sweetie? So keep your head high, keep your chin up, and most importantly, keep smiling, because life's a beautiful thing and there's so much to smile about.
-Marilyn Monroe

Tuesday, 25 March 2014

Year 2 in NYP

Totally done with Year 1 in NYP. After all the shenanigans that happened, I still managed to hit my goals straight in the eye. Year 2, here I come!

Feeling Blessed

Today is the big day! Okay, not so big but for nerds like me, it kind of is haha! First let me thank God for walking with me in my first journey in NYP. I was so lost and didn’t know what to do whenever I faced a problem. However, you were always there even though I was already in the midst of giving up. My mom kept on reminding me that it was nothing. I can overcome whatever problem(s) that may arise, and I really did. Just believe. You were with me through my dearest mother. I thank both of you so much. Much kisses mwa mwa! Gonna end this post with my self-made quote and motto :3
You are your own opponent. The only person you have to beat is yourself because you are your greatest enemy. Mind your own race and finish it, not the other racers’.

Monday, 10 March 2014

Ahuh. Gonna stay away from that until I'm pretty sure what I want. Yup. Yup.

Sunday, 9 March 2014

Bubble Girl

I feel so much like Hazel Grace Lancaster or Jimmy Livingston from Bubble Boy. Sigh. Stupid stupid stupid family history. I wish that was a total load of BS but UGH.

Tuesday, 4 March 2014

No longer a Freshie

Today marks the official last day of my Freshman year. Woo to the hoo! The school holiday is here again and it's gonna be a very long holiday. Can't wait ;)

Thursday, 27 February 2014

Wednesday, 26 February 2014

Monday, 24 February 2014

Void

I hate this feeling
The empty void in my heart
It’s so hollow
I could hear the wind howling
I could feel the coldness
No warmth
Nothing
Everything is so dark
I feel blind for a second and then, then what?
An endless darkness
It just goes on and on
So deep, I can’t find my way
I need the light, the warmth

I need you

Sunday, 23 February 2014

23rd

Those words just bounced off me and just kept on doing so. I re-read those words over and over again until they lost their meaning. My heart felt nothing. I wanted to thrash around, throw my hands, cry my heart out until I couldn’t anymore. But no, I felt like an empty vessel and time seemed to have slowed down for me. I was quiet for a moment until I finished reading the letter. I read it thoroughly, scared that I might miss a word that could make me misunderstood everything. Nothing, I didn’t miss anything. The answer was crystal clear. It was over. For good.


Wednesday, 19 February 2014

Please

My new obsession with typewriters. Omg I just can't. I must have one.

Tuesday, 18 February 2014

Monday, 17 February 2014

My randomness is always in the air I breathe haha

Oh nothing. I just wanna write and write about absolutely random things here right now until I start revising my school work again. This week has been well, up and down. Like a roller coaster for me. The exams is just around the corner and other yada yada stuff that's been happening in my little world. Actually, exams is already next week. Woohoo! You might be asking why I’m cheering, right? You see, instead of dreading the incoming exams, I’ve decided to look forward to it. Not just because I’m a fucking nerd lol(I still hate studying but I love making notes hehe) it’s also because that means the school holiday is freaking coming too! I can’t wait for it J) See, every cloud has a silver lining. Turn something wonderful. Use it as my strength. Use it as my will to go on in life. I’ve been through things in my 18/19 years of existence here on Earth and the most important life lesson I’ve picked up so far is to see bad situations in a different perspective. Try it and you’ll be surprised of what you’ll discover J

Life oh Life

Wednesday, 12 February 2014

Monday, 27 January 2014

I always feel like I'm an option, the second best, a substitute....

Saturday, 4 January 2014

I don't know what to do. I  think I'm falling for you
I've been waiting all my life, and now I found you